The Third Way

One of my favorite passages of scripture is Mark 2:13-17 which recounts the story of Jesus sharing a meal with Levi the tax collector and his friends at Levi’s house.  While Mark doesn’t give us the details of the conversation, we can imagine the scene as Jesus walks through the doorway and into Levi’s house, stopping to take off his sandals and then wash his feet. The smell of smoked fish and freshly baked bread fills the room. Levi and his friends, most of whom are fellow tax collectors and other societal pariahs, are recounting how much they have skimmed off that day’s collections. One brags about how he drove a poor widow to tears as he demanded her last coin, which meant that her child would not eat that day and probably the next day as well. Another laughs uncontrollably as he tells of the crippled man who he made crawl on the floor to pick up a paper he had knocked off the table. The stories go on and on as the assorted group comprised of the dregs of Jewish society tell of the day’s adventures in thievery and debauchery. Levi offers Jesus a cup of wine and a seat at the head of the table, inviting him to partake in the meal of freshly cooked fish and bread. Jesus acknowledges and smiles at each man at the table as he sits down to break bread with them and to join them in their conversation……

 Of course we don’t know the details of what happened during the meal but we are told that Jesus looked on these sinful men with compassion. We know this because when he was asked by the Pharisees why he dined and associated with them he said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” Mark 2:17

I have often found that studying the way Jesus interacted with various people in different situations is just as instructive as the words he spoke. In this case, you have the only sinless person in the history of the world, and God incarnate, sitting down with the dregs of society. We can’t help but be amazed at the humility it took for Jesus to do this.  Think about it, Jesus knew the darkest secrets and hidden sins of every man at the table, yet there he was showing them the respect and courtesy that most thought they did not deserve.

“It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Mark 2:17

Why did Jesus show such respect to these men by sitting down to have a meal with them? Why would he even engage in conversation with these men who represented the exact opposite of what Jesus stood for?  What was he trying to teach his disciples and us by doing this?

It all makes sense when we keep in mind that Jesus’ primary goal was to fulfill the mission of peace and salvation given to him by the Father. In light of this, let’s consider the three ways Jesus could have handled this situation. 

First, he could have acted like the Pharisees and shunned them altogether and not even made the attempt. Result: no opportunity to share and no message heard.

Second, he could have walked into the house, stood at the head of the table, and proceeded to call out each man by listing his sins publicly, damning each to hell for his transgressions. Result: message heard by force but not received and accepted. 

Instead of these, Jesus selected the third and less chosen way which was to engage them by humbling himself and joining them in a meal and conversation. Result: opportunity to share the message and message heard and received. Jesus did what James instructs us to to do in James 1: 19-20 where he writes, “ My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires”.

 Of course the fact that Jesus dined with them does not mean he agreed with the sinful lives these men were leading, but he knew  that if he showed them respect by listening to them, even though he disagreed with everything they said,  then maybe they would show him the respect by listening to his message. He knew that in order to be heard he must listen first. 

“ My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires”.

James 1: 19-20

I recently came across a powerful modern day example of this same approach used by Jesus 2,000 years ago.  I was watching a video of a Trump rally held in Washington D.C. in September of 2017 dubbed by the organizers as the “Mother of All Rallies” (click here to see video). There were hundreds of Trump supporters surrounding a stage where the leader of the group, a man named Tommy Gunn, was giving a speech and leading them in various chants in support of Trump. Nearby, there was a group of folks supporting the Black Lives Matter movement from New York led by a man named Hawk Newsome who was barking into a megaphone, “Black Lives Matter, Black Lives Matter!!”

At first I got a little nervous because I thought wow, this is not going to turn out well. I was waiting for the name calling to get worse or for the violence to start. However, instead of the conflict escalating something incredible happened. Mr. Gunn, the Trump rally leader, called out to Mr. Newsome to come to the stage and invited him to speak! You can tell that members of both groups were in shock as they watched the leader of Black Lives Matter step onto the stage with the leaders of the Trump rally. Mr. Newsome began to address the now combined crowd telling them the issues that his organization stands for. At first the Trump crowd booed him after each statement but then when he made statements they all agreed with they all cheered, including the Trump supporters. When Mr. Newsome was finished he was handed an American flag and they all chanted together, Trump supporters and BLK supporters, “USA! USA!, USA!”

In an interview after the rally Mr. Newsome said, “Today restored my faith in some of those people because when I spoke truths they agreed. I feel we made progress. I feel like two sides that never listen to each other actually made progress today. Did I expect to go on that stage, no. I expected to come down here with my fist in the air in a very militant way and exchange insults maybe some dirty looks and who knows what.  If not on a grander level, but just person to person, I think we really made some substantial steps without either side yielding anything.”

Kenny Johnson, one of the leaders of Bikers for Trump’s Northwest Florida chapter said, “I feel what he said came from his heart when he got on the stage. I probably agree with 90 percent of what he said. I listened to him with much love, respect, and honor, and I got that back, so as far as I’m concerned he’s my brother now.”

“If not on a grander level, but just person to person, I think we really made some substantial steps without either side yielding anything.”

Hawk Newsome, Black Lives Matter-New York

What a beautiful example of a Christ-like approach to a confrontational situation. Rather than focusing on the things they disagreed about, they instead moved onto common ground which can only happen if both sides respect each other. This mutual respect is only established when each feels like they have been heard. This does not mean that both sides agree on everything. In fact, it may be that there is no common ground in which case the worst that can happen is that both sides agree to disagree. However, by showing tolerance toward each other they can build a bridge of mutual respect and walk away in peace. 

I believe this is what the Apostle Paul meant when he said that we must let our conversations be always “full of grace”.  Paul also furthers this idea of civility and grace in disagreement when he says, “the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful” (2 Timothy 2:24). In other words, one will not be able to teach if the other side feels like they have not been heard first.

How much better off would our families, our nation, and our world be if we applied the example of Christ’s humility and respect when dealing with each other in disagreement?  I believe that his third way of humility and openness is the only way to a lasting peace in our individual relationships, our nation, and our world.

“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.”

James 3: 17-18